Counting down to the end of 2009 and getting ready for 2010. Or, "twenty-ten" as I like to call it. 2009 has been interesting. Let's re-cap:
-I competed in my first national shows. One in Charleston and the other in Manhattan. Learning how to travel for shows was an experience I hope to never have to repeat. But, I got through it.
-My parents got remarried after 13 or so years of divorce. Wow, right?
-I officially moved in with someone, and then we broke up. Go figure.
-I paid off both of my credit cards! Yes, I'm still dancing about that one.
I have high hopes for next year (in no particular order):
-Pay off my car (only a few payments left)
-Attempt to balance my life with competing a little better
-Be more agreeable while dieting
I'm sure there are other things that will crop up but as of now, that's the list. I think a lot of things full under the balancing my life umbrella. But, with the next item being to turn pro, I really do need to Focus, Focus, Focus.
Next year I'll be going at it all alone. It has it's good points and it's bad. But, in the end it's all me next year. So I really have no excuse not to focus 100% on me. This has been described as a selfish sport and it really is. In order to truly go far, I need to give it my all. And so now I suppose I won't feel guilty for not having anything left to give anyone else. And when I feel lonely and isolated next year, I'll just have to remember that this is the path that I've chosen.
And then what? Go pro and then what? Well, then the goal becomes the Olympia. (Duh!) Point is, I can't compete forever. No one wants to see a saggy old lady in a Merry Christine suit. Ew! But there is a life post-competition and that is something I have to think about. At some point I might like to try my hand in a relationship again. Maybe. Or, not spend oodles of money on chicken and asparagus. The supplement companies can really stand to do with less of my money and more of someone elses. And maybe, just maybe, I can go on vacay that has nothing to do with rugby (the previous money black hole) or figure competitions. Buy a house and get a dog.
Yes, for all of you out there thinking it, I know that I can't live this way forever. But, for now, this is the choice that I've made. It's important to me. Let's see how far I can really go, shall we?