Monday, August 30, 2010

Where exactly is "out there?"

I had this desire earlier to get all dressed up and eat a fancy, sit-down meal. And then I realized that I wanted to go on a date. And then the thought of dating made my chest hurt and I felt a smidge (if not more) of anxiety. And so...I'm not ready to date. Which is fine since my options these days are extremely limited. One does have to put him or herself out there to date right? Yeah, that would probably have to be step 1. Actually, make that step 2 as step 1 should really be to not be seized with panic at the thought of dating.

Step 1. Be ready to date.
Step 2. Put yourself out there.
Step 3. Figure out where "out there" is.

Got it. ( I swear I've done this's just been a while)

Today is my first day of Crossfit Elements at Crossfit Central. (Can I get a fist pump?) I'm really excited. I spent the mont of August doing a crossfit bootcamp and just loved it. I love the intensity that I can bring to the sport. And I'm such a competitive person that this is perfect for me. I'm really anxious to learn more about crossfit and start applying that to my training. And then??? Crossfit Games! (Again, feel free to fist pump.)

Thursday, August 26, 2010

Unwilling vs unable

Today's my last day of Crossfit Bootcamp and I'm a little sad about that. It's been a ton of fun. So much fun that I decided to up the ante and join the crossfit community. My goal is to compete. When you're me, you have to find something to compete in. I joke that I would do crossword competitions but it's kinda true. I must find something to train for. Something that's harder than everyday activity. Something that most everday people would be unwilling to do.

Unwilling vs Unable

I'm astounded by how many people automatically say how they can't do something. Can't perform. Can't try. Just can't. And it's not that they can't. It's that they won't. Imagine the possibilities and just try. I remind myself occassionally that the only person that can hold me back is me. And then I tell myself that I shouldn't let anyone put limits on what I can do. Myself included.

I mention that because I've enjoyed a great many physical activities in my life. Cheerleading, dance, gymnastics, judo, running, rugby, figure, rock climbing, and crossfit. I meet a lot of people who ask how I do what I do, how I look like I do, and how they can better themselves. And then, I get their excuses. I can't do this, I can't do that. Whatever. Don't tell me what you can't do. Dont' whine and complain and then ask for advice to only set limits on yourself. It's silly and a waste of my time. And please, don't compare yourself to me or anyone else. We all started our fitness journeys at the beginning. For me, it was being able to run an entire 1/4 mile without stopping. Yup, me. The girl who's training for her 4th marathon couldn't run 1 measely quarter mile. But I kept at it and didn't give up. No excuses. Just persistance.

Tuesday, August 17, 2010


Happy Tuesday! Tonight is Crossfit bootcamp and I'm ready to sweat. I need to sweat. One of the things I love about the bootcamp is that I am pushed in ways that I haven't been pushed before. I'm pushed out of my comfort zone. I'm pushed to work harder. And the competitor in me pushes to beat everyone else. It's great. My goal is to come away feeling as if I won. Even though there's not really a race or competition or anything. I still want to feel as if I won. Yeah, I must compete.

After the movie I'm seeing Eat, Pray, Love. I was supposed to see it with friends but it appears that the original plan has fallen through. I bought my ticket and then the movie sold out before everyone else could buy theirs. So it looks as if I'm going alone. Which wouldn't bother me except it is a sold out movie so I'll be crammed in with couples and groups. Akward....

Monday, August 16, 2010


Back from the Europa! It was a really long weekend and I'm in need of another few days off just to recover. Unfortunately I do have to work so I'll just have to power through. I'm proud of myself for eating my meals while away. I've always said that there's no excuse to eat crap. It all comes down to a little planning and preparation. Ok, sometimes a lot of preparation. But it's worth it when there's food handy and it's time to eat. I loaded my big wheely cooler full of protein pancakes (meal 1); greek yogurt, apples, and nuts (meal 2); 4 oz chicken breast in individual baggies, oven roasted veggies, and quinoa (meal 3); cans of tuna and ezekial bread (meal 4); and extra "just in case" baggies of protein powder. That plus my 3 gallons of water went into my car for the trip. Meal 5 was a free dinner with my friends and was eaten out. I'll be honest and admit to eating chicken breast, sweet potato, and a salad on Thursday, Pizza topped with chicken and pesto on Friday, and Chicken Fajitas on Saturday. Oh, and regular pancakes Sunday morning for brunch. But yeah, those were all planned.

Today I lift and do cardio right after work and then get to go climb for rock climbing class. I'm looking forward to class. Looking forward to working my body after not having done any exercise for the last few days. I plan on an early morning cardio session tomorrow and then Crossfit Bootcamp tomorrow evening. And then I'm off to see Eat, Pray, Love at the movies! It's a full week for me but that's how I like it.

ps. I just discovered that I've been mis-weighing my yogurt. Wow, was I overeating! Doh!

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard....

Wow! Long time, no write. I must apologize. It's been much too long. Not sure where I left off but it may have been my journey to Jr Nationals. Well, Chicago came and went and I was in the last callouts again. No bueno. You know, sometimes you stretch and bend every which way and it still doesn't seem like enough. That's kind of how I felt coming off that show. I was all prepared to go to another but I had a "Come to Jesus" chat with my then trainer. I won't go into all the details but it was decided that I would stop, get back to living, and more importantly get my life back on track.

So, fast forward to now. I'm not prepping for a show. I've been doing, well, other things. I've been doing things that I wouldn't have been able to do if I were prepping. Or, things that I wouldn't have done if I were prepping. Staying up much too late. Seeing musicals. Movies. Dinners with friends. The occasional glass of wine. Eating ice cream. Yup, getting back to living.

But I haven't completely nixed my workouts. I'm still at the gym and still doing cardio. Still weigh/measure food. Still trying to eat clean. Trying. Need to try harder. Scratch that. Just need to do it. Trying out Crossfit Bootcamp and rock climbing this month. I like them both. I climb Mon/Wed and have bootcamp Tue/Thur. I fit the gym in Mon/Wed/Sat/Sun. Yup, I'm busy as ever but loving it.

So, one thing that I knew I needed to work on post-competition was the repair of my ailing metabolism. I'm struggling with keeping my weight down, while also letting my body heal. I miss my tiny and tight old self. But I know I can't live at competition weight. Honestly, I don't want to be THAT tiny. But I honestly feel that 123 is a good liveable weight for me. I'm almost 10 lb over that and it is NOT acceptable. So I'm trying to lose, without really trying because I don't want to stress my body. It's been stressed enough.

Crossfit is really into the paleo diet. Hmmm. I tend to work well on a diet. But I've come to hate the term. "Die-t" is what it may as well be. Maybe. Right now I'm doing well keeping my alcohol to a minimum. Now to get my sweet tooth under control.

I've given myself a prize. At 123 I can finally order cable. If I can do it before my birthday (9-21) then I'll buy a laptop and add internet. That's the goal. I'm putting it out there. I was 132.5 last Friday and I'll weigh again this Friday. The number has slowly been creeping up and I must get a handle on it before it's too late and I'm back at a hefty 152. Oh hell no!

So I'm going to try it my way and if it doesn't work then maybe I'll try Paleo or the zone or some or "Die-t." It doesn't help that I just stated that I want a milkshake. Sigh.....